Blowing out candles in the wind~ Blog Hop!

On August 5th I will be 39. Yes, you saw right 39. I am not one of those women who staunchly refuse to tell you her age. I am, however, one of those women who approach birthdays with trepidation. (picture weeping and gnashing of teeth). Maybe it's my vain Leo nature. We can be creatively dramatic at times. Which ironically,makes me a great writer, but it sucks for anyone who has to be around me on my birthday.

I know, I know, I'm blessed to have seen another year. I get that, but it changes nothing LOL. A few years back I adopted a coping mechanism. I started treating my birthdays as if they were my "New Years". It was my way of looking at aging as an exciting work in progress, rather then a slow walk to the guillotine.

Each year on the anniversary of my birth,  I came up with my vision for the next 12 months.What did I want to accomplish in a years time. It worked, I was moving through my year with a goal in mind and I felt a sense of pride in the fact that I was attaining things I'd dreamed of. There was still something missing though, and I really didn't put it together until recently.


Sure, I was setting and achieving certain goals but to what end. As this birthday approached, my emotions again started getting the better of me. Then, one day as I was driving to work my spirit said to me, "You're thinking too small. You are only looking 12 months out, but what about 12 years from now. What do you want the culmination of these months to add up to?" That question was profound to me. I mean, I didn't know, I had a loose idea of what I wanted but I'd never looked at making my annual goals count towards a bigger plan.

I mean seriously, if you don't know where you want to go, how can you go about getting there. This thinking was text book for me. I had heard it hundreds of times in my life, but I guess it hadn't clicked until recently. It's like getting on the road and just driving without a destination in mind, taking life as it comes. In my twenties  and early  thirties I saw life as a random series of events to be lived through, learning lessons along the way. Then I got older. I'm not knocking that approach. I lived that approach, but getting older, at least in my case, has made me realize that it's important to use your time here wisely and FOR A PURPOSE, you only have a certain amount of year, do you bullshit it away investing in people and things that do nothing but waste your time (you know who and what they are) or do you look at the bigger picture? decide what you want all of this time to add up to and start working towards that year by year.

As I look out my window and see 40 walking down my street, I realize I  am the type of person who has to have a plan. It would be easier for me to live the random life, but I am a bit of an analytic in many ways. Things have to make sense.  I firmly believe we are here to learn lessons, but also to be an asset to our bloodlines. As a black American, my ancestor went through pure hell for me to sit here and type out this blog. So many didn't even make it to the shores of America during the passage from Africa. Many bloodlines were also extinguished during slavery, but I am here, which means my bloodlines are strong, I am the product of winners and survivors. It's up to me to see that when I leave this earth, my family has accomplished more than my fore fathers. I honestly could speak about that for hours but I will stay in my lane this time. LOL (I told you I was a thinker.)

At any rate,  as I approach this birthday, it is with a renewed mind. I have a five year goal in mind now, and I am piecing together how the next 60 months will look. This step from micro thinking to macro thinking has been eye opening for me. I'm sure there are people who have been doing this all their lives and it's second nature for them to live like this, but it's new to me and I am excited to see the results. It's given my life perspective; it's given my thoughts a new avenue down which to travel. Without a long term goal in life you can and will accomplish things however, they will be arbitrary. Before you know it, random events will choose your destiny for you. You will go where those events take you, and  there are many paths in life to take, some productive some counter productive. By knowing what your interest are, what you value most and what you believe, you can define where you want your life to go. You can choose how you want to spend your time here on earth.When you make decisions, even the tough ones...especially the tough ones, it will be with your long term goal in mind. I can see how that could make tough decisions a bit easier.  So, having a long term goal is important. That's what I'm all about for now. I know you've listened to me preach enough LOL... I have a Blog Hop to host now!!!

Yes! this is also, a SUPER SPECIAL BIRTHDAY BLOG!!!!!

I happen to share birthdays with two other very talented writers (Stephanie Williams and Eden Royce) and we are celebrating our birthday by giving you(yes, you) a chance to win a gift. Each one of us are having a give away. So, how can you win a gift from your's truly Gynger Fyer. It's simple. We all have key words in our blogs. You must read our blogs and locate our individual key words. Once you have the key words "Instant Message" them to me on Face Book.  If you are not on FB, you can e-mail them to me at www.gyngerfyer@gmail.com  One lucky winner will receive their choice of a $25 gift certificate for Amazon.com,  $20 gas card or a $50 gift card to Macy's!!!!

You have until 7p.m. Eastern Standard Time on 08/04/2013 to provide all three key words so your name can be entered into the contest!! What are you waiting for?? Get busy blog hopping!!!

Stephanie Williams Blog:  http://stephaniewilliamsauthor.wordpress.com/

Eden Royce's Blog: 

http://darkgeisha.wordpress.com

AFTER THOUGHT: (HINT-Keyword is below)
After hearing me moan about turning 39, a good friend of mine told me 40 was fun! At the time I didn't believe that statement. However, with my new found clarity. I can see that 40 can be fun and so can 50 and 60 and 70 and 80 and 90. If I am blessed to see those years, I can't wait to discover the knowledge and wisdom those years will bring. I can't wait to see how that knowledge will impact my writing. I hope you will be there with me throughout this journey. I pray that romance and love will always have relevance in your life. I thank you for reading this post and all of the ones I've written in the last 12 months. I pray that they were an inspiration to you.Speaking of inspiration. Here are some pics of people who are inspiring me for my birthday! My keyword is something all of these ladies have "Fyer"

Angela Bassett

Raquel Welch 70+

stunning and beautiful 56-year-old executive who continues to live healthy and love life.

Linda Wood Hoyte 70 old!!!

60 year old body builder Wendy Ida!